It's reality...bitch, deal with it.

20100327, 6:40 PM

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posted by Cici @ 6:40 PM 0 comments

20090615, 6:09 PM

FINALLY GOT MY MARKS...

lmfao so I have been waiting like 2 weeks for my Film, Television and Society mark to come in. My TA was horrible, I just spoke to my prof, and he said he had handed it in late. that muhfukka! It's horrible I got the first three letters of the alphabet in the three courses I took. Film, Television and Society - A Environmental Art and Culture - B Introduction to World Religions - C lmfao...religions? I didn't even go to the lectures, plus I didn't hand in a few things... oops! oh well, I still passed. Plus that damn tutorial was way too early in the morning. It takes over an hour and a half to travel to school, and then to be at 8:30am? NOOOOO SIRRR. lol NEVER will I do that to myself again. Environmental Art and Culture, oh man...me and my girl Tanisha were so lost in that class, we hardly paid attention in the second term. I will not lie, I didn't really pay much attention, but I passed lol with flying colours none the less, again my papers...well lets just say i didn't put much effort into them. Film, Television and Society, I loved that course! however, I couldn't say that the TA was any good. bleh. OHHH WELL!

posted by Cici @ 6:09 PM 0 comments

20090513, 10:31 PM

Dear You

Dear You; I know you can’t really hear,

But what your momma called to tell me was the worst of my fears.
I didn’t ever think I would never hear from you again,
From the moment we met we were nothing but best of friends
She called and told me that she had some bad news,
Said I should sit because it was something about you.
I got scared; I didn’t even know what to think
A little girl who had a daddy and then lost him in a blink.
It’s so strange to me, that almost 2 years ago today,
Was same time that Tasha was walking away.
I can’t fathom the idea of the little one,
Finding out that Daddy had no where to run.
Your daughter, I’ll treat her like she’s mini me,
Make sure she grows up with love from an aunty.
With tears that have started to roll down my face,
I know that no one can ever take your place.
I wish your mom told me sooner so I coulda came out to N.C.
Being by your side is where a friend should be.
But your mom didn’t want me to worry, thought it’d be too much to bare,
But as one of your very best friends I knew all I could do was care.
It’s been years since you’ve moved, and we’ve been through so much
I remember everything about you, from your scent to your touch.
Acted like my big brother when I needed you the most,
Telling me not to cry over burnt toast.
I’ll forever love you TK, and that will always be true,
You’re forever a part of me, and I was blessed to have known you.

RIP Tyler King 1984 - 2009

Labels: Friendship

posted by Cici @ 10:31 PM 0 comments

20090501, 11:54 AM

Invisible

"Why can’t you see me Do I really even matter You changed me completely And I remember how it used to be I got question what’s the lesson I’m tired of being confused and I’m I’m gonna take my chance and fly I’m taking back my life I gotta find me another way Cause I don’t wanna stay another day Time for a change in my mind I’v opened my eyes I’m changing my life And now I’m gonna live my life for me Cause this aint how it’s supposed to be No more standing in the back of the line Cause I’m invisible for the last time" -- Jennifer Hudson, "Invisible"

This is completely how I feel right now. bleh...it's a weird situation to get into.

posted by Cici @ 11:54 AM 0 comments

20090414, 11:05 PM

Reminiscing the Past.

I miss my youth. I miss being too tough to care. I miss playing football with the guys, without someone thinking that I'm fucking with one of them. I miss all of that and more. I miss when my great-grandmother would give me orange Tic Tacs just because. She never used to eat them, she was a diabetic, but she'd always have Tic Tacs in her bag just for me, my brother, and my cousin. It was that love that I felt as a kid I feel I can never get back at this time and age. Things are different now, people expect you to grow up so fast in this world. I mean think about it...children are wanting to wear bras and they're not even developing yet...or they're already 10 and fully developed. I don't know, I mean I would give anything to be a kid again. I'd love to run in the grass without a care in the world, stay home and play video games for the rest of the week without having to think "this is how much money I'm wasting because I'm not going to class". The world is so different from this perspective. You actually start to see how the government school system doesn't help prepare you at all unless you had the right teachers who actually gave a fuck about you in school...like it wasn't actually just a job to them. They enjoyed it...they made sure their students would succeed in the end. In all my years in school, I think I can only think of 5 teachers who actually cared about my well being back then. It's kinda sad...

posted by Cici @ 11:05 PM 1 comments

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About

Hi there, I'm Cici. That's what people tend to call me anyway. I'm 20 years old, and have been statistically challenged practically all my life. Music is my passion. I wouldn't give up the ability to hear for anything in my life. I've practically lived my whole life in Toronto. This city is mine. I'm a sucker for shoes. Yes, Shoes! No, I do not have some sort of foot fetish. I just like purchasing shoes. Especially a good pair of sneakers or flats. I have made many mistakes in my life, but that's what helps me grow as a person. I wouldn't change that for anything in the world. This is me, the real me. My life is totally unscripted. This is a dose of reality. My reality. Welcome to my world.

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